My sister asked Garth Brooks this question a few years ago, and since then I've always thought it was a pretty interesting question. In my opinion, everyone has two different theme songs at any point in time. The first is the music you would want to hear played as you entered a room. For Sista ND (who posed the question) her song would be "Superstitious" by Stevie Wonder. I think I'd like to have "Running with the Devil" by Van Halen play as I enter a room.
My other theme song has been much harder for me to identify. This is the song that has lyrics which capture who you are, or where you're at. Obviously this song is different depending on where you are in the journey of life. Recently a friend of mine observed that had it been out when we were in college, "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" by Big and Rich would have been a good theme song for us.
So what is my theme song these days? I'm still not sure. These lyrics capture the past week or so:
I can't get to sleep
I think about the implications
Of diving in too deep
And possibly the complications
Especially at night
I worry over situations
I know will be alright
It's just overkill
From "Overkill" by Men at Work
Then again, last night I heard these lyrics while driving last night and identified with them:
I see my folks, they're getting old, I watch their bodies change...
I know they see the same in me, And it makes us both feel strange...
No matter how you tell yourself, It's what we all go through...
Those eyes are pretty hard to take when they're staring' back at you.
Scared you'll run out of time.
Chorus
------
When did the choices get so hard?
With so much more at stake.
Life gets mighty precious when there's less of it to waste.
Hummmm...Scared she'll run out of time.
From "Nick of Time" by Bonnie Raitt
However I don't consider either of these to be my theme song. I'm still searching for one...
So I leave you with the obvious question - what are your theme songs?
Friday, June 29, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Life's A Beach
You know, I've been to the beach more in the past week (3 times) than I have in the past 3 years...
Having grown up 2 miles from the Atlantic Ocean, you might be surprised to discover that I actually was never much of a beach person. I blame this on my mother. Or, more accurately, my mother's hair. Her hair turns into insta-afro when exposed to any level of humidity. Plus there were five of us. No one with any desire to maintain their sanity brings five children to the beach without any assistance. So, growing up, I rarely went to the beach. Once I got older I spent my summers working (starting illegally at the age of 13, but that's another post).
I mentioned this to my father and he said "oh no - I took you guys at least one time each summer. But you were always the one complaining - my feet hurt, there are too many rocks, what if something bites me in the water..." Funny, this is pretty much what Thing 2 said to me last week when we went to the beach. He really does take after his mother...except 30 yrs ago they didn't have watershoes. Once I put those on him he was good to go.
So, what is causing my recent beach activity? Easy. The answer all stay at home parents give: IT OCCUPIES THE CHILDREN!!!!
We've been going to a portion of the beach where the ocean flows behind the sand dunes, creating tidal pools when the tide is low enough. Which means the water is anywhere from 3-8 inches deep and full of marine life. The boys are having a blast gathering hermit crabs, crawfish, eels, snails, and the occasional blue crab. I've got to admit even I'm having a blast. It's a great way to spend a couple of hours and the boys are having too much fun to fight with each other. Add in all the other kids their age who are at the beach and it is, honestly, the perfect day. I can foresee myself doing this with the boys all summer long.
Having grown up 2 miles from the Atlantic Ocean, you might be surprised to discover that I actually was never much of a beach person. I blame this on my mother. Or, more accurately, my mother's hair. Her hair turns into insta-afro when exposed to any level of humidity. Plus there were five of us. No one with any desire to maintain their sanity brings five children to the beach without any assistance. So, growing up, I rarely went to the beach. Once I got older I spent my summers working (starting illegally at the age of 13, but that's another post).
I mentioned this to my father and he said "oh no - I took you guys at least one time each summer. But you were always the one complaining - my feet hurt, there are too many rocks, what if something bites me in the water..." Funny, this is pretty much what Thing 2 said to me last week when we went to the beach. He really does take after his mother...except 30 yrs ago they didn't have watershoes. Once I put those on him he was good to go.
So, what is causing my recent beach activity? Easy. The answer all stay at home parents give: IT OCCUPIES THE CHILDREN!!!!
We've been going to a portion of the beach where the ocean flows behind the sand dunes, creating tidal pools when the tide is low enough. Which means the water is anywhere from 3-8 inches deep and full of marine life. The boys are having a blast gathering hermit crabs, crawfish, eels, snails, and the occasional blue crab. I've got to admit even I'm having a blast. It's a great way to spend a couple of hours and the boys are having too much fun to fight with each other. Add in all the other kids their age who are at the beach and it is, honestly, the perfect day. I can foresee myself doing this with the boys all summer long.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
I can't think of a title for this one...
We've been trying for 6 or 7 months to get Nurse Hottie's vasectomy scheduled. I can't even begin to explain the ridiculousness of why it hasn't happened other than to say that a)referrals suck and b)having your company change your insurance mid-year sucks big time and c)having your doctor leave her practice after giving you a referral that is no longer valid b/c your insurance has changed truly sucks.
Phew.
So I got sick of this and called my ob-gyn's office on Monday and basically said this: exactly how invasive is the tubal ligation...
My doctor just called me back to chat with me about it and so we've scheduled it. For next week. Gulp. Ironically enough, today is Thing 1's birthday. So I've made the decision, for real, for good, not to have any more kids on his birthday. I don't know how I feel about this. Actually I do, it's just hard to say. I would love to have a 3rd child. What I don't want is a 3rd baby. If someone could drop off a 2-yr old right now I'd take him. But an infant? I just don't want to go there again. And I really don't want Nurse Hottie having a 20 yr old when he's 58, and I really don't want to have to cut back on my business because I'm caring for a newborn, and then there's the fact that we gave up all the "baby equipment" a few years ago, and - well - you get the picture. All of my reasons for not having another baby are fairly selfish. Which seems wrong.
I've talked about this before, on my blog and in person with my friends. I've achieved a level of comfort with myself on this issue...but having the actual appt scheduled is churning up the feelings again.
Phew.
So I got sick of this and called my ob-gyn's office on Monday and basically said this: exactly how invasive is the tubal ligation...
My doctor just called me back to chat with me about it and so we've scheduled it. For next week. Gulp. Ironically enough, today is Thing 1's birthday. So I've made the decision, for real, for good, not to have any more kids on his birthday. I don't know how I feel about this. Actually I do, it's just hard to say. I would love to have a 3rd child. What I don't want is a 3rd baby. If someone could drop off a 2-yr old right now I'd take him. But an infant? I just don't want to go there again. And I really don't want Nurse Hottie having a 20 yr old when he's 58, and I really don't want to have to cut back on my business because I'm caring for a newborn, and then there's the fact that we gave up all the "baby equipment" a few years ago, and - well - you get the picture. All of my reasons for not having another baby are fairly selfish. Which seems wrong.
I've talked about this before, on my blog and in person with my friends. I've achieved a level of comfort with myself on this issue...but having the actual appt scheduled is churning up the feelings again.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Some Questions...
I haven't blogged, or really even been online much this past week. I'll explain briefly: my best friend and her family were visiting last week, my inlaws arrived Thursday and didn't leave until this morning, and we had Thing 1's 5th birthday party on Saturday. It was a fun week, but today I just want to sit and RELAX.
But I do have a question. This was my first official "kids" party that I've thrown. I think it went well - thanks to all the help from the aforementioned best friend. She asked me an interesting question during the planning, which was "are you going to serve alcohol?"
I did attend a child's party earlier this year where booze was available. So this isn't a completely foreign concept to me...yet it is. I know that, in fact, a lot of adults serve alcohol at children's party - but something about this feels wrong to me. A few years ago a couple of fathers were trick or treating in our neighborhood and were drinking beers - this really unneverved me. Am I alone in this? I should state that for the record I do drink, not as frequently as I did before having kids, but I'm not alcohol adverse by any means. As a child I remember my parents having adult parties with a lot of booze (and the police being called several times for noise violations...but that's a whole other post), but never at our birthday parties. But my father stopped drinking when I was around five, which means that there wasn't a whole of of daily alcohol consumption at our house. The same is currently true in my own household since my husband no longer drinks. So, without further ado, here are my questions for the world at large:
Am I alone in this attitude that alcohol and kids don't really mix? Is this something that actually is quite normal but because I wasn't personally exposed to it I see as being abnormal? Is this a new trend or has it always been this way?
Just wondering.
But I do have a question. This was my first official "kids" party that I've thrown. I think it went well - thanks to all the help from the aforementioned best friend. She asked me an interesting question during the planning, which was "are you going to serve alcohol?"
I did attend a child's party earlier this year where booze was available. So this isn't a completely foreign concept to me...yet it is. I know that, in fact, a lot of adults serve alcohol at children's party - but something about this feels wrong to me. A few years ago a couple of fathers were trick or treating in our neighborhood and were drinking beers - this really unneverved me. Am I alone in this? I should state that for the record I do drink, not as frequently as I did before having kids, but I'm not alcohol adverse by any means. As a child I remember my parents having adult parties with a lot of booze (and the police being called several times for noise violations...but that's a whole other post), but never at our birthday parties. But my father stopped drinking when I was around five, which means that there wasn't a whole of of daily alcohol consumption at our house. The same is currently true in my own household since my husband no longer drinks. So, without further ado, here are my questions for the world at large:
Am I alone in this attitude that alcohol and kids don't really mix? Is this something that actually is quite normal but because I wasn't personally exposed to it I see as being abnormal? Is this a new trend or has it always been this way?
Just wondering.
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Random Musical Thoughts
What is a Hollaback Girl?
What does HOVA mean (H to the izzo, V to the izzay - yeah, I'm probably totally screwing this line up - but if you don't recognize the line, you definitely won't be able to help me with this one)?
Just wondering.
Lyric comprehension hasn't ever really been my strong suit. In fact, I spent most of my childhood thinking Jimmy Buffett stepped on a poptart in Margaritaville, and that Kenny Rogers had "four hundred children and a crop and a field" to take care of after Lucille left his ass. In fact, I only realized it was hungry instead of hundred a few years ago.
You know, I'm not really sure why my parents even owned a Kenny Rogers album. My mother was only in her thirties when I was a teen, and given her whole strong semi-black woman thing the majority of her albums were of the Michael Jackson variety. My friends thought it was so cool that my Mom owned the Thriller album. And the soundtrack to "Breakin'". I don't think she ever actually listened to these things, I think it was her way of counteracting the ownership of the aforementioned Kenny Rogers album.
I'm feeling the urge to confess to the world that I do own greatest hits CD's from both Neil Diamond and Barry Manilow. Oh crap - and Air Supply too. Suddenly I feel like I'm in the church confessional. Forgive me father, for I have purchased soft rock. And country, and rap, one CD from that blind opera dude, and a number of those "Now That's What I Call Music" CD's.
What can I say - I'm a musical schizo. As further proof I give you my last five itunes purchases (and this is straight off the purchased playlist):
Hole Hearted - Extreme
Overkill - Men at Work
You Can Do It - Ice Cube
Ridin' - Chamillionaire and Krayzie Bone
If Everyone Cared - Nickelback
What does HOVA mean (H to the izzo, V to the izzay - yeah, I'm probably totally screwing this line up - but if you don't recognize the line, you definitely won't be able to help me with this one)?
Just wondering.
Lyric comprehension hasn't ever really been my strong suit. In fact, I spent most of my childhood thinking Jimmy Buffett stepped on a poptart in Margaritaville, and that Kenny Rogers had "four hundred children and a crop and a field" to take care of after Lucille left his ass. In fact, I only realized it was hungry instead of hundred a few years ago.
You know, I'm not really sure why my parents even owned a Kenny Rogers album. My mother was only in her thirties when I was a teen, and given her whole strong semi-black woman thing the majority of her albums were of the Michael Jackson variety. My friends thought it was so cool that my Mom owned the Thriller album. And the soundtrack to "Breakin'". I don't think she ever actually listened to these things, I think it was her way of counteracting the ownership of the aforementioned Kenny Rogers album.
I'm feeling the urge to confess to the world that I do own greatest hits CD's from both Neil Diamond and Barry Manilow. Oh crap - and Air Supply too. Suddenly I feel like I'm in the church confessional. Forgive me father, for I have purchased soft rock. And country, and rap, one CD from that blind opera dude, and a number of those "Now That's What I Call Music" CD's.
What can I say - I'm a musical schizo. As further proof I give you my last five itunes purchases (and this is straight off the purchased playlist):
Hole Hearted - Extreme
Overkill - Men at Work
You Can Do It - Ice Cube
Ridin' - Chamillionaire and Krayzie Bone
If Everyone Cared - Nickelback
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Bad Thing 2!
There's a problem in our household. A serious one, that I don't know how to solve.
Thing 2, previously known as my sweet, cuddly, angel boy, has changed. This is the child that if we went to the bank without his brother, would insist that we get a lollipop for him. He was thoughtful and loving. And he still is, at times.
But lately he has become a hitter. Not just a tap on the hand hitter either. Oh no, we're talking full on punches here, Mike Tyson style (thankfully he doesn't seem to have any need to bite anyone's ear off). In my mind I've started thinking of him as "Fists of Fury". He started whaling on his brother at a local sub shop the other day and although I was only about 2 feet away he got in 5 or 6 good, hard, hits. Not only is he physically aggressive, but he is so incredibly angry in those moments. This is not the child I have known for almost four years. I'm not sure who this is.
Now, on the positive side (what little positive side there is) he's not hitting anyone other than his brother. The teachers at preschool haven't seen any indication of this behavior. They still think he's a sweetie pie, and remain clueless about the Ali within. Also, to Thing 1's credit, he's not hitting his brother back.
On the incredibly frustratingly (yeah, I'm making words up here) negative side, neither my husband nor I have a clue as to a)where this anger and aggression are coming from and b)how to stop it. We've given timeouts, stopped and talked to him, explained to him that this is inappropriate, etc. etc. I'm really at a loss. I welcome any suggestions anyone who has seen/experienced this (particularly anyone willing to tell me this is just a phase :)
Thing 2, previously known as my sweet, cuddly, angel boy, has changed. This is the child that if we went to the bank without his brother, would insist that we get a lollipop for him. He was thoughtful and loving. And he still is, at times.
But lately he has become a hitter. Not just a tap on the hand hitter either. Oh no, we're talking full on punches here, Mike Tyson style (thankfully he doesn't seem to have any need to bite anyone's ear off). In my mind I've started thinking of him as "Fists of Fury". He started whaling on his brother at a local sub shop the other day and although I was only about 2 feet away he got in 5 or 6 good, hard, hits. Not only is he physically aggressive, but he is so incredibly angry in those moments. This is not the child I have known for almost four years. I'm not sure who this is.
Now, on the positive side (what little positive side there is) he's not hitting anyone other than his brother. The teachers at preschool haven't seen any indication of this behavior. They still think he's a sweetie pie, and remain clueless about the Ali within. Also, to Thing 1's credit, he's not hitting his brother back.
On the incredibly frustratingly (yeah, I'm making words up here) negative side, neither my husband nor I have a clue as to a)where this anger and aggression are coming from and b)how to stop it. We've given timeouts, stopped and talked to him, explained to him that this is inappropriate, etc. etc. I'm really at a loss. I welcome any suggestions anyone who has seen/experienced this (particularly anyone willing to tell me this is just a phase :)
Monday, June 04, 2007
What's This Blog All About
Yeah, I don't know either.
I started blogging late last year as a way to share pics/stories with my friends and family that don't live nearby. Or at least that's what I said. The fact is that I really started it as something to do. My grandmother was near death (in fact she died within a week of my first post) and I needed a distraction. Losing her daily presence in my life has been the hardest thing I've ever faced. I knew it would be hard, I knew it was coming, and so I tried to find ways to occupy myself. So that's really the reason I started blogging.
After tax season I found myself with some free time, so I started checking out other blogs. I've found a lot of cool stuff out there. This seems to be the internet medium for the 30-somethings (probably because we're too old for the Myspace). There's are mommy bloggers, political bloggers, and issue bloggers. There are people who are writing to make you laugh and people who are writing to make you think. So this leads to the question I've been asking - what kind of blogger am I?
A schizophrenic one, I think.
It's confusing to try to categorize yourself. I think that while I'm fairly open about who I am in real life, the fact is that even amongst my friends I have different facets that I share. Generally I like to laugh. A lot. So I don't know any of my friends that I don't share that aspect of myself with. But I'm also serious. As someone who had given up religion a few years back, lately I find myself truly trying to figure out what I believe. So I'm trying to self-educate - not just about religions, but about politics and history. After a painful foot injury, I'm trying to become more physically active again. I'm confident, but lately I've been hesitant in social situations. I'm a lot of things wrapped up in one body - but then again, aren't we all?
I'm rambling here. When I sat down to write tonight I had about four totally different ideas about what I could post about - and as a result this is what emerged.
I started blogging late last year as a way to share pics/stories with my friends and family that don't live nearby. Or at least that's what I said. The fact is that I really started it as something to do. My grandmother was near death (in fact she died within a week of my first post) and I needed a distraction. Losing her daily presence in my life has been the hardest thing I've ever faced. I knew it would be hard, I knew it was coming, and so I tried to find ways to occupy myself. So that's really the reason I started blogging.
After tax season I found myself with some free time, so I started checking out other blogs. I've found a lot of cool stuff out there. This seems to be the internet medium for the 30-somethings (probably because we're too old for the Myspace). There's are mommy bloggers, political bloggers, and issue bloggers. There are people who are writing to make you laugh and people who are writing to make you think. So this leads to the question I've been asking - what kind of blogger am I?
A schizophrenic one, I think.
It's confusing to try to categorize yourself. I think that while I'm fairly open about who I am in real life, the fact is that even amongst my friends I have different facets that I share. Generally I like to laugh. A lot. So I don't know any of my friends that I don't share that aspect of myself with. But I'm also serious. As someone who had given up religion a few years back, lately I find myself truly trying to figure out what I believe. So I'm trying to self-educate - not just about religions, but about politics and history. After a painful foot injury, I'm trying to become more physically active again. I'm confident, but lately I've been hesitant in social situations. I'm a lot of things wrapped up in one body - but then again, aren't we all?
I'm rambling here. When I sat down to write tonight I had about four totally different ideas about what I could post about - and as a result this is what emerged.
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