I'm having a bad week

Let's review:
First...Thing 1 returns home from school with his nose and forehead all scraped up - apparently he inherited my athletic skills. Here's the story in his words:

"I kicked the soccer ball. And then I kicked it, and I kicked it, and I kicked it, and then oops, I missed it and fell and hurt my whole face"

Second...It was corporate tax return deadline day. Actually I was done by one o'clock, which for a procrastinator like myself is a minor miracle. Still, I was stressed out from the moment I woke up until I finished everything.

Third...I missed entering my ncaa picks in a pool I was going to do by ten minutes. I totally forgot about it and then when I went online to enter saw that the first game had started - score of 2-5...

Fourth...I'm coming down with something flu-like.

Fifth...I have to have sinus surgery. I've never had any surgical procedure before, so I'm really nervous about this.

BUT - there is always the silver lining. To make myself feel better, I like to look at and ridicule those who are less fortunate than me. Examples:

The guy who came into the ER recently to have a dildo removed from his butt. Sadly, this happens much more frequently than you would imagine. My favorite story involves a priest who said he slipped and "fell on it". Oops - how in the world did that get there? And, I must ask, how long do you try to remove it before you feel that medical intervention is necessary?

Carmen Electra and Alison Sweeney (days of our lives' Sami). Here's a video of them doing their best "I'm too sexy" on the runway. If I tell you what happens it ruins it, so you'll have to just watch:

http://www.myfoxla.com/myfox/pages/InsideFox/Detail?contentId=2679482&version=2&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=VSTY&pageId=5.2.1


Brandon Rogers, who actually got the boot before Sanjaya. Who, every single week, inspires my husband to say "what the fuck is that hairdo?"

Continuing the American Idol theme - Diana Ross. Was she drunk when she picked out that costume??? Seriously, what was THAT? And the singing...oh, the singing. If the judges could have reviewed her here's what they would have said:
Randy: Diana Dog, that was just not good. Very Pitchy - you were shouting the whole time.
Paula: Diana, well, for a sixty plus woman with four face lifts, you look beautiful. I would totally wear that boa as well. I do wish you'd sung something a little more, I don't know, less lyrical? You know, something with a lot more music and a lot less slinging, I mean singing. Oops, sorry, too much coca cola again (laughs and falls off chair).
Simon: I have no idea what Paula is talking about. However, Ms. Ross, you reminded me of a drunken, used, has-been hotel lounge singer. That was truly ghastly.
Diana - shouting: Thank you!

See, I'm feeling better already!